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Green Couple Orlando Bloom And Miranda Kerr Engaged?

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We’re so awesomely terrible at these wedding rumors (see: Jen and John planing a green wedding), that I wouldn’t be surprised if The Sunday Telegraph is once more setting us up for disappointment.

According to their exclusive information, Orlando Bloom and longtime girlfriend Miranda Kerr are engaged. “The wedding is planned for the middle of next year, when both have a break from work commitments,” the article states. “Bloom and Kerr, who live together in New York, celebrated their engagement with a romantic getaway in Venice last week.”

Will there be a green wedding? Will Kerr finally get that vegetable patch, gaggle of kids, and a solar-powered home? Will Stella McCartney design her dress?

Jesus, I need a drink. Don’t be surprised if publicists for both shoot these rumors down. More info available here.

[UPDATE: As expected, the “exclusive” story is apparently not true. More details over on JustJared.]

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Veld donates money to farm animals and also serves them

Lest we be confused that their giant V logo stands for anything other than Veld.

Trading beef for beans is not a solution, veganism is

Please do substitute beef for beans, but also have tofu instead of turkey, carrots instead of chicken, and I think you see where I’m going.

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Assuming we can extort people into respecting the lives of others makes no sense.