by ecorazzicontributor
Categories: People, Z-2
Tags: , .

According to Ashton Kutcher, the apocalypse is at hand, and he’s getting in the best shape of his life so he can save Demi Moore and the rest of his loved ones.

Or, at least that’s what he told a reporter in the February 2011 issue of Men’s Health. According to the journalist, Kutcher said this in all seriousness and maintains that when doomsday arrives he intends to be amongst the toughest and smartest to survive.

So, why does the 32-year-old feel so strongly that there may be something to that Mayan calendar?

“It will not take much for people to hit the panic button,” he told the magazine. “The amount of convenience that people rely on based on electricity alone… People don’t have maps anymore. People use their iPhones or GPS systems, so if there’s no electricity, nobody has maps.”

The talk about our reliance on electronic devices continued, “And people are going to go, ‘That land’s not yours, prove that it’s yours,’ and the only thing you have to prove it’s yours is on an electric file. Then it’s like, ‘What’s the value of currency, and whose food is whose?’ People’s alarm systems at their homes will no longer work. Neither will our heating, our garbage disposals, hot-water heaters that run on gas but depend on electricity – what happens when all our modern conveniences fail? I’m going to be ready to take myself and my family to a safe place where they don’t have to worry.”

It’s reported in the magazine that Kutcher’s favorite memory in recent years was of last Christmas, when he and his family lost power for 14 hours at their mountain cabin. “It was 20 below zero,” he stated. “I got my guns out. We made a fire. We went to the grocery store, and the doors were open because they’re all electronic. People were rolling in and out, clearing out the shelves.” He added, “I’m telling you, it was like a preview [of what’s to come]… All of my physical fitness regimen is completely tailored around the end of day. I stay fit for no other reason than to save the people I care about.”

The former Punk’d actor jogs up the sides of Runyon Canyon by his home where he pretends, according to the interview, that he’s being chased by wild boars or aliens, whatever apocalyptic creatures he conjures up that day. He also puts himself through hours of searing Bikram yoga to simulate what being stuck in the desert sans water might be like… You just can’t make this stuff up.

Where I live in Los Angeles, an alarming number of folks discuss the inevitability of “the big one” hitting as if it has been reported by the local weather man as part of this weeks forecast. I don’t doubt that it will hit, and I keep telling myself to stock up on water and flashlights in case I do happen to get trapped in between my apartment and an electricity free place.

But working out so I can fend off the hordes of electronic-crazed masses? I dunno. I suppose we all need our motivations at the gym…

  • Jeffrey

    wow, just…wow.

  • Yikes-A-Hooty

    Ashton Kutcher is a tool. Toughest? Possibly. Smartest? Really, Ashton? I have a 12 year old dog with a higher IQ than you. Get over yourself sweetie. You are NOT all that. You may have bagged Demi Moore but that is only bec she was desperate for attention and validation. You gave her both, you win. Sort of. Fear mongering is almost as bad as hate mongering. Trolls.

  • Cynthia Duncan

    Just could not resist to comment on Mr. Kutcher. The only thing he will will running from is Demi Moore when she catches him again with another woman!

  • http://None Foxtrot

    Cynthia,you are correct.Usually,some men after a few years of marriage require “a strange interlude.” He has had his apocalypse.

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  • Wendy

    It may or may not happen. How are we to know? And if it does, he’s right. There will be total chaos with people destroying other people. But I prefer to think on the lines of Jo Dunning, where we all have to power to ascend to a higher intelligence and get through whatever may come. It’s up to us as individuals.
    But, yes, history shows that when disaster strikes, people are hell bent on destroying everything in site. What a sick species we are.

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  • Erin Elizabeth

    I hope he’s wrong but I think in the end he might not be.. Get ready…