by Michael dEstries
Categories: Music.

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Just when you thought the upcoming Spice Girls Reunion Tour couldn’t be any more worthless for humanity, it now appears that the planet is going to suffer the consequences as well. Woe be the times.

According to reports issued earlier this month, each member of the Spice Girls will be given their own private jet to accommodate their entourage of assistants, family members, and massive egos. Rumors (or just plain good ‘ole intuition) have indicated that the separate jets symbolize the still shaky relationship between the group that caused them to split up in the first place. Like Lord Voldemort’s soul in the Harry Potter series, these horcruxes of musical drudgery have somehow managed to persevere through repeated worldwide insistence that we all have better things to listen to.

According to the green site, greenhelpline.com, the Spice Girls will generate an immense 9,500 tons of carbon dioxide through flights alone. From the article,

“‘It’s everyone’s responsibility to limit the damage we’re doing to our planet. But clearly, some celebrities feel they don’t count. While we have events like Live Earth to raise awareness, many stars are still taking huge liberties such as using private jets,’ site founder Lambie was quoted as saying.”

About Michael dEstries

Michael has been blogging since 2005 on issues such as sustainability, renewable energy, philanthropy, and healthy living. He regularly contributes to a slew of publications, as well as consulting with companies looking to make an impact using the web and social media. He lives in Ithaca, NY with his family on an apple farm.

View all posts by Michael dEstries →
  • Kat

    Thats retarded! Why in the first place will they have a reiunon.. none will go

  • Christian

    “these horcruxes of musical drudgery”

    Brill, simply, amazingly, fantastically brill.

  • http://sandrabernal.hi5.com sandra bernal

    Ha.. do you honestly think that little Mrs. beckham will show up.. yeah right.. she has better things to do than reunite with old friends which do not get along with her. GOOD LUCK WITH THAT REUNION!!!

  • Deena

    That’s pretty bad. Massive egos are not good for the Earth.

  • http://ecoflorida.blogspot.com Holly

    I hope soon that people will see way-out-there “luxury” is often bad for the planet.

  • Lauren

    You’re all crazy. Over 3 million people registered for tickets. They had to add more touring dates just to accomodate more of them. They may have their egos, but they know it and their fans know it that they still have their stage magic. Which is why everyone wants to go!

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