There have been plenty of “naughty, not nice” this week and we’re calling them out on this week’s Notice Board! Let’s get to it!
First off, Jennifer Aniston. We’re giving her points for her charity work, but questioning her latest purchase of a 9,000 square foot home in Malibu for $15 million. Obviously, if you’re single and looking to find the ultimate bachelorette pad, you want a little space to party in. But Jen, 9,000 sq. feet? Games of hide ‘n go seek would take three days inside that thing, and what exactly do you plan on achieving with such space? Next!
Ford Motor Corp is obviously fishing for something with their new ‘organic’ color schemes…you guys should focus more on your MPG+ and a new marketing push. Ask yourself why Toyota is getting good marketing from Celebrities and you might find an answer somewhere…
Note to Jessica Alba — Bottled water is a scam. I’ve tasted the water in Malibu and it’s fine. If you’re truly worried, go with a Brita filter.
Al Gore — People have complained that we were too hard on you for including a light-duty truck in your motorcade. We’ll agree that it was a small nitpick, but in a time of elections and important propositions, giving the other side any ammo to attack you with is never wise. We’ll take it back if the truck was running on bio-diesel. Or the fears of Oil Executives.
The O.C. — Who is “Che”? While lines like “Every second that goes by, another chicken dies” are meant to be amusing, we’re thinking that this guy is just going to add another layer of misconception to the green movement. Plus, Mischa Barton’s death last season was really lame.
Liz Hurley — Your wedding. It’s Huge. “In fact, Liz’s plans are so lavish that she’s reportedly told family and friends to keep an entire month free for the celebration – set to take place in North-east India next February.” Still planning on saving the world with that organic farm? Two steps forward, two steps back…
MTV Green Store — MTV and Walmart: Together At Last. The offspring of this collaboration is about as appealing as watching MTV…in a Walmart. The SciFi Channel and Dairy Queen could probably come up with a better way to showcase sustainability.
And finally, Kurt Cobain. During this time of All-Hallows Eve, we must reach out to Kurt and congratulate him on becoming the highest-paid dead celebrity for 2006. Besides his music being used in some network TV shows, it was also reported that “it could be used in commercials for eco-friendly products.” Anyone else find this statement a little random or staged? Is Kurt riding the green bandwagon? We’re watching you, Cobain! Eco products aside, songs like “Dumb”, “The Man Who Sold The World”, or “All Apologies” would make great theme songs for the Bush Administration.