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Cashback On “Premature Slaughter”

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Hooray for the dairy-consuming residents of California and other states, you may be eligible to claim up to $30 due to your friendly neighbourhood dairy industry “prematurely slaughtering” cattle.

That’s right folks, a lawsuit against a number of high-profile dairy producers may result in you being awarded some cash – provided that you’re a consumer of torture and death. According to a Berkeley-based law firm, more than 500,000 cows were “slaughtered early” between 2003 and 2010 as part of a “herd retirement program” to “reduce the supply of milk” and “inflate its costs to consumers nationally.” Members of Cooperatives Working Together (CWT) made around £9 billion in revenue as a result of the “premature slaughter” and subsequent “price fixings.”

But don’t despair. Provided you are a resident of a dozen or so select states, and have “purchased milk or fresh milk products (including cream, half and half, yoghurt, cottage cheese, cream cheese or sour cream) from 2003 to present,” you can file a claim online and right the terrible wrongdoing of CWT! It’s easy, there’s a website and everything. You don’t even need your receipts!

What a relief. There I was thinking about the cows and how they don’t really give a flying fuck whether they’re slaughtered on Monday or Friday; how we violate their fundamental rights by treating them as replaceable resources; how as property their inherent value as sentient beings is denied and they’re viewed as nothing more than inanimate objects; how their use and deaths are no less immoral regardless of when they’re slaughtered, and how they – like the other trillions of nonhumans being exploited by humans – need us to go vegan in recognition of their most basic moral right not to be commodified as things for human use.

But clearly I was wrong, all the cows want is for you to get some of your money back for a “product” that was meant for their slaughtered babies. How silly of me to think otherwise.

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  • Sunil Hingorani

    I was swindled of $2 every year by those who who killed my cow early.

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